// HODGES_ULTIMATUM.PS
// Clubs may ACCEPT or REJECT.
// Hodges may FORGIVE, but will absolutely NEVER FORGET.
INIT:
clubs = GET_ALL_CLUBS()
blacklist = []
hodgesMood = "PettyButOrganised"
FOR EACH club IN clubs:
PRINT "Sending Hodges Ultimatum to " + club.name + "..."
club.choice = GET_RESPONSE(club) // "ACCEPT" or "REJECT"
IF club.choice == "ACCEPT" THEN
PRINT club.name + " has ACCEPTED. Marking as FAVOURED."
club.status = "FAVOURED"
// Nice things… temporarily
club.tradePriority = "HIGH"
club.discountOnMediocrePlayers = 10%
club.rumourAccess = "EarlyBSMail"
PRINT "// Hodges Note: Will answer their calls before the 5th ring."
PRINT "// For now."
ELSE IF club.choice == "REJECT" THEN
PRINT club.name + " has REJECTED. Brave. Incorrect, but brave."
club.status = "DEAD_TO_HODGES"
ADD_TO_BLACKLIST(blacklist, club)
// Activate PREMIUM P E T T Y mode
club.tradePriority = "BELOW_TRIAL_MATCH_REF"
club.emailReplyTime = "3–7 business seasons"
club.rumourAccess = "FacebookCommentsOnly"
club.extraFee = "Hodges Emotional Damage Tax"
club.phoneRouting = "DirectToVoicemailWithNoNotification"
PRINT "// Hodges Log: PERMANENT_MEMORY[" + club.name + "] = 'Rejected ultimatum sober.'"
PRINT "// Future note: Smile politely in public. Destroy quietly in negotiations."
ENDIF
END FOR
FUNCTION ADD_TO_BLACKLIST(blacklist, club):
APPEND blacklist, club
PRINT ">> " + club.name + " added to BLACKLIST."
PRINT ">> Official status: 'We remember what you did.'"
// FUTURE DEALINGS
FUNCTION REQUEST_DEAL(club, dealDetails):
IF club IN blacklist THEN
PRINT club.name + " attempting future deal… how adorable."
PRINT "// Auto-reply: ‘Unfortunately, our petty-o-meter is still in the red.’"
PRINT "// Suggested action: Wait 1–2 eras and try again."
RETURN "REQUEST_DENIED_WITH_EXTRA_ATTITUDE"
ELSE
PRINT "Processing deal normally for " + club.name + "."
RETURN "REQUEST_APPROVED"
ENDIF