Social 🌼 Life’s Lessons

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Beastmode

Beastmode

Contributor
I definitely agree as we get older we get wiser. There’s a lot of old people on this site. So a lot of wise men. What are the lessons in life that you will share with your kids or have made you realise.

Happy in life = happy at work

There are a lot of miserable Aholes at my work place. Many I have come to despise. However, I have come to the realisation they are miserable at work become they are miserable in their lives. It really has nothing to do with me…

Old wounds resurfaces as you get older

Noticed recently aches and pains in areas of my leg and back where I was injured years ago playing rugby. For context broke my fibula and now find that spot starting to ache… in fact I find after you hit 40 the number of health problems starts to increase exponentially….

It’s not just what you know it’s who you know. Life isn’t fair.

Influence. You could be the smartest person in the room but unless you can use it to influence the right people, you won’t get what you deserve. So chose your friends and enermies wisely

Keen to hear other peoples experiences
 
How old are you bro?

I'm 38 and you have me worried about the 'health problems after 40' bit haha. But deffo the sore back has been notable for the last few years.

A massive one for me I've come to appreciate is 'comparison is the thief of joy'.

Picking your battles is another one for me - yes we can all probably nag at the Mrs for every little pissing thing they do that annoy you, but if you're both doing that then you're going to have a miserable existence...
 
Criticism is a natural human instinct

Those who weren’t able to criticise are probably extinct like the dinosaurs. 🦕 😂 The problem now is everywhere you go and all you see across social media and in life is people criticising each other. It’s now a toxic behaviour that is becoming more and more acceptable. I find myself criticising the most trivial of things without even realising it then feeling bad for having criticised the individual. My wife 😂

There needs to be more awareness made of this behaviour. It’s the old glass half empty half full analogy. But it’s never more true than in today’s world…
 
Maybe a touch younger than Bruce.
But-give up grog.
Eat wisely
Exercise walk 30 mins a day for starters
These 3 things will make your body less achy painy breaky.

Realise you can only control what you can control. Outside of that you cnat control it so dont worry about it.

Save for retirement - most dont give it a thought until about 55 then its too late.
And the hardest one try and be nice to your wife.
 
I've learnt a few things about life and myself in the last 10-15 years that have been of benefit.
Here are some of them.
Experiences from childhood and the thoughts and mantras evolved at that time stay with you. This can be both good and not so good. For me, childhood was solely about survival. Stay ahead of the situation, plan, avoid situations, avoid talking, physical presence and that kind of stuff. I always defaulted to the worst case scenario and that was being killed. Work back from there each time.
I didn't form any emotional bonds with anyone, so my emotional development was virtually non existant. So too was physical touch.
My experience of hugging and physical contact was with dogs, not humans. So I only associated physical touch with sex, once I reached pubity and there after.
I married young, it lasted for 28years until one day I simply walked out. I had not had any feelings for my wife for the previous 20 years but I had three kids to raise and I was the sole income earned all that time. I had a plan for financial independence and to retire early and I pursued this all that time with some success but at a huge personal cost which I now understand.
So my life from 20-50 was much like a business contract. I built a life within my marriage. I didn't stray, didn't argue much, I just ignored anything I chose to, built impregnable walls. I thought I was doing well.
As Frank W has mentioned, sport and regular physical training is very important. I lifted weights for 30 years and played lots of tennis and I'm certain that without this outlet, my defences would not have lasted as long as they did.
I also binge drank a few times a year, until collapsing usually. This started at 14 or 15 years of age. I've learnt this was a form of escape.
I've learnt life is made up of various stages. In my mid 40's I started to reflect on a few things, particularly my view of my mother who abandoned me at the age of four and was killed shortly after, didn't know my father. Anyway, I had no feelings for her, I didn't know her and that was fine until I started wondering what a life she must have had and perhaps she did her best. This caused me some upset over for a few years and was the initial crack in my defence.
I guess what I'm saying is you can only get so far on faulty foundations in life and it has taken me far to long to realise that. Eventually, the house of cards will come crashing down.
I regret not backing myself more, taking a few more risks in business. I regret staying in a stagnant marriage because I placed false value on matrimonial assets, kids and routine.
I regret not understanding what true love is and happiness and denying myself of it.
I've told plenty of people to fuck off and can't remember one I regret.
 
dean said:
I've learnt a few things about life and myself in the last 10-15 years that have been of benefit.
Here are some of them.
Experiences from childhood and the thoughts and mantras evolved at that time stay with you. This can be both good and not so good. For me, childhood was solely about survival. Stay ahead of the situation, plan, avoid situations, avoid talking, physical presence and that kind of stuff. I always defaulted to the worst case scenario and that was being killed. Work back from there each time.
I didn't form any emotional bonds with anyone, so my emotional development was virtually non existant. So too was physical touch.
My experience of hugging and physical contact was with dogs, not humans. So I only associated physical touch with sex, once I reached pubity and there after.
I married young, it lasted for 28years until one day I simply walked out. I had not had any feelings for my wife for the previous 20 years but I had three kids to raise and I was the sole income earned all that time. I had a plan for financial independence and to retire early and I pursued this all that time with some success but at a huge personal cost which I now understand.
So my life from 20-50 was much like a business contract. I built a life within my marriage. I didn't stray, didn't argue much, I just ignored anything I chose to, built impregnable walls. I thought I was doing well.
As Frank W has mentioned, sport and regular physical training is very important. I lifted weights for 30 years and played lots of tennis and I'm certain that without this outlet, my defences would not have lasted as long as they did.
I also binge drank a few times a year, until collapsing usually. This started at 14 or 15 years of age. I've learnt this was a form of escape.
I've learnt life is made up of various stages. In my mid 40's I started to reflect on a few things, particularly my view of my mother who abandoned me at the age of four and was killed shortly after, didn't know my father. Anyway, I had no feelings for her, I didn't know her and that was fine until I started wondering what a life she must have had and perhaps she did her best. This caused me some upset over for a few years and was the initial crack in my defence.
I guess what I'm saying is you can only get so far on faulty foundations in life and it has taken me far to long to realise that. Eventually, the house of cards will come crashing down.
I regret not backing myself more, taking a few more risks in business. I regret staying in a stagnant marriage because I placed false value on matrimonial assets, kids and routine.
I regret not understanding what true love is and happiness and denying myself of it.
I've told plenty of people to fuck off and can't remember one I regret.
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Great post. I think many can relate to what you’re saying. Myself included. You go through this routine and wham! Mid-life crisis comes along and makes you question everything. You have kids though. They will pass on your linage. Your behaviours and your teaching. At least that’s what hope for with mine. I try to be the best parent for my kids. In fact I do it all for my boys now. I’ve had my fun in the sun. So it’s no longer about me but about getting my kids to an age where I can walk away knowing I provided for them as best I could as a parent…. but priorities, values and opinions can change overtime. It’s never too late. Live life to the fullest with no regrets. Another cliche easier said than done. Good luck in your journey.
 
dean said:
I've learnt a few things about life and myself in the last 10-15 years that have been of benefit.
Here are some of them.
Experiences from childhood and the thoughts and mantras evolved at that time stay with you. This can be both good and not so good. For me, childhood was solely about survival. Stay ahead of the situation, plan, avoid situations, avoid talking, physical presence and that kind of stuff. I always defaulted to the worst case scenario and that was being killed. Work back from there each time.
I didn't form any emotional bonds with anyone, so my emotional development was virtually non existant. So too was physical touch.
My experience of hugging and physical contact was with dogs, not humans. So I only associated physical touch with sex, once I reached pubity and there after.
I married young, it lasted for 28years until one day I simply walked out. I had not had any feelings for my wife for the previous 20 years but I had three kids to raise and I was the sole income earned all that time. I had a plan for financial independence and to retire early and I pursued this all that time with some success but at a huge personal cost which I now understand.
So my life from 20-50 was much like a business contract. I built a life within my marriage. I didn't stray, didn't argue much, I just ignored anything I chose to, built impregnable walls. I thought I was doing well.
As Frank W has mentioned, sport and regular physical training is very important. I lifted weights for 30 years and played lots of tennis and I'm certain that without this outlet, my defences would not have lasted as long as they did.
I also binge drank a few times a year, until collapsing usually. This started at 14 or 15 years of age. I've learnt this was a form of escape.
I've learnt life is made up of various stages. In my mid 40's I started to reflect on a few things, particularly my view of my mother who abandoned me at the age of four and was killed shortly after, didn't know my father. Anyway, I had no feelings for her, I didn't know her and that was fine until I started wondering what a life she must have had and perhaps she did her best. This caused me some upset over for a few years and was the initial crack in my defence.
I guess what I'm saying is you can only get so far on faulty foundations in life and it has taken me far to long to realise that. Eventually, the house of cards will come crashing down.
I regret not backing myself more, taking a few more risks in business. I regret staying in a stagnant marriage because I placed false value on matrimonial assets, kids and routine.
I regret not understanding what true love is and happiness and denying myself of it.
I've told plenty of people to fuck off and can't remember one I regret.
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Some similarities to my life in parts. Great and honest post
 
Noitall said:
Some similarities to my life in parts. Great and honest post
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I met @Beastmode a few years ago in Wellington, he called me a woke retard and I called him a closet transgender because of his unhealthy fascination with Candace Owens videos, and we've been mates ever since. Then we burned down the playground.


Edit- I was going to post the pic of the big ginger Warriors fan at the lockdown protests, but it's disappeared with the old site. The Turks ruined my joke.
 
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Worried2Death said:
Physical health is obviously good for mental health, but they're not the same thing. Exhibit A. - NRL players.
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NRL players arent healthy. They are strong and fit. But they endure in excess of 15 car crashes a game. Then take excessive pain and anti inflammatory medication to do it all again the next week.

Have a look at the average life expectancies of these guys.
 
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My peice of wisdom for my kids was passed to me by my grandad who came to NZ as a WW2 orphan after surviving concentration camps in Poland, he said bubala, don't trust anyone who tells you with certainty that they know what the purpose of life is, no one knows that any more than you do, so watch out for their motives. Especially if it's a religion or a politician. Now go get me a pack of Winfield 25s, Rugby League Week and the latest Penthouse, and don't tell your grandma. Get yourself an iceblock.
The memories are flooding back now.
 
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Fantastic Worried2Death

When I was 21 I sat on a bus and the bus driver looked at my youth and said if i were your age and know what I know now I could conquer the world.

At the age now of 51 I don't have any profound thoughts that would let me conquer the world. The only half hearted advice I give to my direct reports at work about the secret to success is to be on time for work everyday,
 
MrFrankWhite said:
NRL players arent healthy. They are strong and fit. But they endure in excess of 15 car crashes a game. Then take excessive pain and anti inflammatory medication to do it all again the next week.

Have a look at the average life expectancies of these guys.
Click to expand...
There's another season of the series Match Fit screening over here in NZ currently - this one is a combo of ex-Kiwis and All Blacks. A few of the ones on the show have stayed in terrific shape 10-20 years after retirement but others just gave up on fitness and a controlled diet and the show is about getting them back on track. Their metabolic age on the first episode was a massive shock. Well worth a watch.
 
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