General Matt Elliots shortlived life on this forum

Matt Elliott

Fake Account
Hi everyone. This is my first Post on here. And I wish you A-Holes would get off my back, and let me get on with the job.

It may interest some of you to know that I have donated 1% of my salary to the Mainland Cheese Yellow Penguins fund.

It may not sound much, but if you knew what they were paying me, you'd be impressed with such a generous donation.

Also I expect some of you may be wondering why I have voted for the Coach to be dismissed immediately.

It's because I'm on a very generous redundancy package, of which I will also donate 1%.

It's not an easy job here.

I was told the players would do the exact opposite of what the coach wanted,

So I employed some reverse psychology, and told them the opposite of what I wanted.

The problem is, half of them obeyed, and the other half didn't.

So there was some major confusion.

And this has taken hold now. No matter what I say, half do it, and half do the opposite.
And then there's another third....[ never good at maths, except for salary matters]....who just do what they want anyway.

As I said, it's not easy in NZ for a Aussie coach, even if I do have a spot of Maori blood in me, but we won't go into that here.

[Mum has explained to me what happened at that New Years Eve Fancy Dress dance, and it's all totally understandable.]

Anyway, none of it matters much, as I don't think I'll be here too much longer.

Nothing to do with results.

Mainly to do with the fact that I might be getting the sack.

Really, really don't know why.

You all do know that Benji Marshall was all set to come to this club ?

But then he said he'd rather play Rugby that work under me.

I don't think that's a good choice. Rugby has far less shows on TV.

That's it. First Post over.

Phew. Quite tired now.

Worse than a match.

Many more to come though.

Nudge nudge, wink wink !!

BTW I've set up a bar Tab for any Warriors Supporters to go and have a drink on me down at the Local pub.

It's the......Oh damn it......What's the name of it ? Can't remember now !!

Anyway, try anywhere you go.

Mention my name.

I'm sure you'll get a response.